catching up..

So, got that MRI done,
guess I really should've
listened/believed in Dr. Evil,
and saved myself that hit
from the in$urance
deductable. But, damn,
never had tendonitis quite
this bad before. I needed
to see what was going on
inside. No doubts, ya know?

Been spinnin' a bit on the
road and stretching and
doin my interpretation
of the yoga flow and
rubbing in the arnica.
And, shit, that damn
knee of mine is actually
feeling better, go figure.

Not willing though, not yet
willing to trade my Saturdays
on the stream for pedaling
long distances. Harassing
those trout is great balance
to the elevated heartrate,
sometimes dizzy tunnel of
the Sunday ride....

Autumn is here, colors
are changing, in the trees,
in the water. Got up to
explore the Little J a couple
times now. Got turned
onto it after reading about
the electro survey.

Survey says that it's pretty
much a wild brown fishery.
Not stocked, not too many
hold over fingerlings, wild
streambred browns, cool.

Great day up there last wknd,
best day of fishin' I've had
in a while. Hungry & feisty
wild fish, best one went 15ish
on the guesstimated ruler,
average was a solid 12.
Freely rising to a dry presented
in that just oh so right way,
good times....

And the local brookies!
BLING! The males are starting
to strut their stuff trying
to impress the ladies and
are soon to get it on, producing
the next generation, sweet.

Meeshow is an amazing place,
world class riding, world class
natives, and it's all right out
the door. Damn, I sure am
lucky to have such an incredible
backyard playground.


Tractor made me do it.

Apparantly, he wants
to get the word out.

Put out the word to those
who are uninformed, but
who might have interest.
An interest in trying to
ride your bike fasterer
than the other guy can
ride his, or her, bike
thru the forest of Meeshow.

There is beer involved. Beer
is involved and is also tied
to your entry into this non
event of unadvertised bike
event nonsense.

If you think you might be
down like a clown, then drop
me a note, and I might be able
to clue you in....it's happening
this Saturday, before it gets
dark out, and maybe abit past
that. Might need lights, might
not...just be sure to bring
good beer. We'll get out of
the woods safely.



fires burn, if there's fuel.
in the mind, inspiration is fuel.
no inspiration, no fuel, no fire.

gimped up coming out of
the spectacular ski season.
something just wasn't
quite right.

not like it was before.

singular focus and lack
of proper maintenance
produced some apparently
serious imbalance issues.

balance between muscle
groups, balance of desires,
motivation, inspirations.

what more is there, was there,
is there? felt like I'd written a
good bit of that story, definitely
put a bit of final punctuation
on this most recent chapter.

step back, let the embers
smolder and seek some
balance. thought that balance
could come from substituting
sport for sport, but it runs

springtime came, and there
was no desire. no desire to
log the pedal stroke suffering
it takes, the commitment, the
convictions of belief that it's
'worth it'.

there was no longer fuel
for that fire.

the knee.

the knee ached, does ache.
the MRI shows minimal issues,
beyond a poorly tracking and
stressed patella. the meniscus,
the Xcl's are all intact and looking
healthy solid, so those doubts are
now at rest, and I can sleep easier.

the knee, I reflect and wonder.
cuz now it kinda feels like a
scapegoat, an excuse for not
having that fire in the belly that's
been there for soooo many years.

an excuse to not admit that I just
don't have it, that the fire's gone
out. it's a pill to swallow after
fighting all those windmills.

an out, a reason not to.
a reason not to saddle up and pedal,
a reason to do something else.
something much less taxing
on the body and mind.

revisit neglected passions
and seek and explore.

took a laissez fare approach,
just see if things would come
around on their own, they have,
sort of, but it's been slow, tiny
little baby steps towards betterness.
the magnetic pictures tell a tale,
and now put the onus
squarely in my lap.

I want to ski this winter.
I want to ski hard this winter
carve thru the trees and rip
the shit out of some favorite
lines and float again thru that
quiet expanded space of mid
air launching.

whooosh, poof, ahhhhh.

And I want to catch more trouts,
and pedal my bike. And pedal
my bike once again in pursuit of
things not yet done.

I have ideas, dreams, that were
backburnered as I've dealt with
this transition. I've felt that if
I would just harden the fuck up,
the knee thing would correct itself.

But that's not the attitude I need,
not the attitude to make it work.

Accept that I'm softer now with a
belly full of embers, not the previously
raging flames and it's about balance,
finding the balance to feed the beast,
with time given to not feeding that beast,
to not satiating that hunger.

Got a couple months to shed this lazy
man's anchorlike belly, a couple months
to get that patella tracking as it should
and find that balance between adrenal
desires, dreams and intimate mtn stream
mind game pursuits.

So I'm gonna close this chapter,
this chapter's worth of summertime
rebooting. Been checked out in
the shop, and there's work to be
done, but not work work, not like
before. Can't go back, can't ever
go back and catch that wave again,
it's run itself out and crashed onto
the shore.

So gotta find those smaller swells,
let it come to me, breath deep
and wait for the next set, and the
one after and the next and the next,
doing the prep it takes for when that
cyclical storm calls once again.

Square one, once again.


tuna on a cane pole.

and here I thought old school
cane poles were only good for
catching sunnies out of the
local pond.....damn, this guy
is nuts.. and, wow.

Big Yellowfin Tuna on bamboo - Ascension Island 2010 from Morten Svendsen on Vimeo.


not racing.

there's something to it.
get rippin' drunk the
Friday night before?

yeah, who cares.

pack in a hurry, pack half assed
and severely hungover, take the
fishin' kit just in case.

low stress, low low low when
there are no expectations on
yourself, for yourself, by yourself.
been diggin' it.

flattered. flattered by Mumbles,
his assigning me the duty to follow
the top dog uber fast ponies
down those big VA mtn descents.

yeah, like I can hang....

got some decent footage, I think,
hopefully it turns up. got some
decent footage of what it's like to
be dropped over and over and
over again. sweet footage of the
fast guys getting smaller & smaller
into the distance.

rinse and repeat on Braley's,
got a few stills before those
batteries died, ughhh. finally
didn't get dropped, ripping
a fine one down on Pat's wheel.

Then huff & puff trying not to
get dropped by le Churtle's pace
on the flats into CP4...

call it a day.
then enjoy the apres' scene.

but feel a tang. a tinge of
something missing from
the day. that shared battle

man, I gotta get this fucking
knee thing figured out, it's
been long enough.

wonder if I've screwed over
my ski season, waiting a bit
too long....time to get in line
for that tubular magnetic picture
taker I guess. And hope three
months is enough.

but first...a sesh of beginner
Yoga, because I really don't
like knives.



watch this fishin' video, shot on the McKenzie in OR.
from about 1:35 thru 1:55, what is that 'creature' in
the lower lefthand corner? hmmmmmm...